Monday, November 14, 2011

Fizikal Romeo, Jiwa Nobita

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"Rough, Tough SDARians. Physically and Mentally"

Aku masa kecik-kecik dulu ada konflik dalaman. Sebab aku perasan cara parents aku besarkan aku dengan adik-beradik yang lain sangat berbeza kot. Diorang bila buat salah lebih, parents aku just tegur guna bahasa je, sekali-sekala la ada guna tangan. Aku bila buat salah masa kecik-kecik dulu memang kena yang fizikal dulu, lepas tu baru mak ayah aku lecture. Sampai satu masa tu, aku nangis kot sorang-sorang dalam toilet bila fikirkan “aku ni anak angkat ke?” Punyalah beremosi time tu hehehe…. Mak aku memang lebih tegas dalam membesarkan kitorang adik-beradik. Kalau aku buat salah, memang mak tak kisah depan budak ngaji ke, family ke confirm aku kena. Kawan-kawan sekolah aku yang mengaji dengan mak aku memang faham la. Kat sekolah bukan main berkaliber, dekat rumah kena pukul dengan mak depan kawan-kawan hahaha…. Tapi pukul bersebab la, memang salah aku terang-terang pun. MALAS, BUAT BISING, TAK DENGAR KATA. Aku pun kena faham juga, anak perempuan cara mak ayah aku besarkan diorang memang la lain, aku lelaki so cara dia pun lain la. Kalau sama nanti dah besar jadi lain la kan, apa pun tak boleh.

“sometimes, lessons learnt in life aren't always flowers and sunshine. Hardship builds character. Just take it like a man and strive on.” –SDARian-

Tapi bila dah masuk SDAR, baru aku sedar cara didikan mak aku tu lah yang membuatkan aku tak lembik dan cengeng, jiwa kental der!!! Aku masa first and second year kat SDAR tak berapa nak bahagia, so dua tahun tu memang banyak makan hati je la. Nasib baik ada seorang dua kawan aku yang setia bersama (cewah), dan Alhamdulillah sampai sekarang aku bangga panggil diorang best friends aku. Kutuk-kutuk memang biasa la, ayat nak pedas je kan. Nak sound cakap direct je, siapa yang kena tu berdesing telinga dengar. Biasa la "adik-beradik" lelaki tegur memang kasar sikit. Sebab tu kalau setakat kena ketuk-ketampi dengan senior or kene rotan dengan warden, no problemo. Sakit memang la sakit tapi tak ada la sampai nak menyumpah seranah or telefon rumah kata “mak tadi abang kena rotan~”. Tak ada pun nak report or panggil lawyer semua macam sesetengah kes tu. Sekarang anak dengan parents sama naik. Fizikal Romeo, jiwa nobita. Ceh!!

Sebab tu kelmarin bila aku tengok satu video seorang budak kat US ni kena pukul dengan parents dia, aku tak adalah nak membantah sekeras-kerasnya atau setuju dengan sepenuhnya. Setiap parents ada cara tersendiri nak didik anak dia, asalkan tak membahayakan nyawa. Trust me, I’ve been through worse than that, dan aku sangat-sangat berterima kasih kepada mak ayah aku untuk apa yang diorang buat. Tengoklah ‘PRODUK’ dia sekarang. *sengih*. Tak ada ibu bapa atau cikgu yang 100% perfect dalam membesarkan anak-anak sebab mendidik anak bukannya macam pergi kelas belajar theory “how to raise children” lepas tu terus jadi anak yang soleh. Mendidik anak adalah satu perkara yang hanya boleh dipelajari serentak dengan proses membesarkan anak itu sendiri. Jadi sebagai anak, sebagaimana kita inginkan ibu bapa dan cikgu memberi kita peluang untuk menjadi anak yang baik, kita juga perlu beri mereka peluang untuk menjadi ibu bapa dan pendidik yang baik. Nanti esok kita dah ada anak sendiri, mana yang baik daripada parents kita ambil, kalau ada yang kurang kita baiki. Kalau macam tu InsyaAllah akan wujud institusi keluarga yang makin cemerlang dari generasi ke generasi.

Khairul

5 comments:

wankhai said...

Oh well. I think it works differently in Western and Asian societies. In the West, children are independent human beings, where since babies were born they were taught to be less dependent on others.That is why parents in the West have separate room for their baby to sleep- so that babies don't get truly traumatized due to separation anxiety. There is also no such thing as being obedient to parents.As one friend told me, "She's my daughter, not my slave" that she has to use pyshical punishment to put her child into submission. Submission in itself encourages kids to think that everything their parents do is right, which it isn't. So, I take the context there and I disagree wholeheartedly with that parents punishing kids with physical punishment. In fact,legal actions could be taken on that. Charges just couldn't be made because the event happened more than seven years ago, for that video.

This middle of the year, I had a talk with my dad while he was driving me to KL, and he told me that when he got me, he and my mom were totally clueless. They're young, they didn't know what to do, they only had their own parents to set their example.He said if he can rewind the time, he won't use psychical punishment to treat me and my lil brother, he would do it totally differently.He said that he just didn't know that there were alternatives besides physically disciplining us at that time- there were no negotiations between parents and kids, setting up ground rules,rewards and punishment- in his own words , " 99% of how I should raise you shouldn't be dealt with anger, scolding or psychical punishment at all".He just didn't realise that such options exist, that what kids think or act is just their nature, that kids didn't need total discipline, and let kids be kids. This comes from a policeman, and I am glad to hear this.

I'm happy that my parents clearly recognise their mistakes in raising me,and tried to do it differently with my younger siblings. I just see it as me being the first experiment, the first prototype.

So yeah,I'm taking a different direction with what you're arguing.

ryu shin ah said...

yg penting, bile ko sukses 1 day nnt ko xlupekan org tue ko tu...
ko masih beruntung sbb tuhan bg peluang utk ko bls jase kedua2 org tue ko...sayangilah mereka selagi hayat mereka ada...
~aku mmg sgt terasa kehilangan 'Abah' aku..

Anonymous said...

der ko mmg tough kot!!!

-muhammad nurhelmi! - ^_^

A.KHAIRUL said...

@wankhai: what you say is also right. Still i think to some extent parents should rotan their children, so that kids know if they do bad things they have to face the punishment.=)

@syafi: aku akan ingat nasihat kau tu.=)

@mentol: Apa cerita tol? hahaha, kau perli aku ke apa. Aku ni keping je, kau lain la pakai baju semua dah ketat.

Anonymous said...

nurhelmi@mentol

hahahaahahaha mane ade perli skem...tough hati la maksud aku hehehehhe mane ade aku pakai baju ketat2